70 Things You Can Do While Being Hospitalized by Lasse Toft, detailed book review

Lasse Toft’s 70 Things You Can Do While Being Hospitalized is a darkly humorous survival guide for patients enduring the monotony and psychological strain of long-term hospitalization. The book presents seventy unconventional activities, ranging from playful pranks to absurd entrepreneurial ventures, all designed to combat the fear, boredom, and helplessness that often accompany hospital stays. Toft’s central message, “FEAR CAN BE A PRISON. HOPE AND HUMOR IS YOUR KEY OUT,” encapsulates the book’s philosophy: humour and creativity can serve as vital tools for mental survival. Written from the perspective of someone who spent six months in hospitals, including time in intensive care, the book blends irreverent humour with genuine coping strategies. Suggestions like Dressing as the Reaper to prank fellow patients or Faking Your Own Death to test staff reactions may seem outrageous. Still, they reveal a more profound truth about the need for control and distraction in an otherwise oppressive environment. While not all ideas are practical, the book’s value lies in its ability to reframe hospitalisation as an experience that can be endured, even subverted, through imagination and defiance.

The authenticity of Toft’s suggestions stems from his ordeal, making this more than just a collection of jokes. He writes from raw experience, having endured the loneliness and vulnerability of being a long-term patient. His admission that “Saturday evenings was for sure the worst to get through. It was on Saturday evenings that I really felt trapped and as if my life was over” underscores the emotional weight behind his humour. Many of his proposals, such as Celebrating the Fastest Nurse or Establishing Your Own Betting Company, were born from real moments of frustration or absurdity during his stay. Even his darkest quips, like the suggested tombstone text “At last, I found that damn parking place,” reflect a mindset forged in the crucible of prolonged suffering. This lived experience lends credibility to the book’s more outlandish ideas, as they are not mere whimsy but strategies Toft used to preserve his sanity. His footnote about sending a triumphant text (“Lasse vs Death 1-0”) after surviving a critical moment captures the resilience underlying his humour. Readers can trust that these suggestions, however bizarre, come from someone who truly understands the hospital experience.

A critical examination of Toft’s proposals reveals a mix of viable and impractical ideas. Among the most effective are those that foster small acts of control or social connection, such as Implementing a Smiley Scheme to rate staff or Organising a Concorso d’Eleganza for wheelchair decorations. These findings align with psychological research, which shows that even minor autonomy can improve patient morale. Similarly, his emphasis on humour as medicine (“Humor really is the best – and sometimes the only – medicine”) is supported by studies on laughter’s stress-relieving benefits. However, many suggestions cross into impracticality or ethical grey areas. Sneaking into the Morgue for Solitude or Making Money Selling Hospital Inventory are unfeasible, if not illegal. Others, like Creating a Spooky Night at the Hospital to scare fellow patients, risk causing genuine distress. The book’s strength lies not in literal execution but in its underlying principles: creativity as resistance, humour as therapy, and small rebellions as a path to mental freedom. While some ideas are best enjoyed as thought experiments, others, like his reflection that “the misery of other people doesn’t solve your problems, but you can regard them as cheap tuition,” offer real psychological insight.

For patients, simply reading this book can be a therapeutic experience. Its absurdity provides a welcome escape from the sterile hospital routine, offering laughs where few might expect to find them. The sheer audacity of proposals like shouting “BABBA SHAH DANG DINGDONG HALLELUJAH” during a fake healing ritual or plotting to “see your Search History on Google” as the devil can transform passive boredom into active amusement. Even if readers never act on these ideas, the book’s tone encourages a shift in perspective, reminding patients that humour can coexist with hardship. Toft’s closing anecdote about the boy saving jellyfish (“Well, it made a difference to that one”) subtly reinforces this message: small acts, even imaginary ones, can make a difference in how one endures suffering.

For a patient, the best way to read 70 Things You Can Do While Being Hospitalized is in short, deliberate bursts—perhaps 2-3 activities per day—treating each suggestion as both entertainment and a mental challenge. Start with the least disruptive ideas (like brainstorming absurd tombstone texts or imagining staff reactions to fake scenarios) to gauge your comfort level, then gradually explore more involved concepts if your energy and hospital environment allow. Keep the book as a playful escape hatch: when boredom or frustration peaks, flip to a random page and let Toft’s dark humour reframe your perspective, remembering his credo that “Humor really is the best – and sometimes the only – medicine.” Pair reading with light experimentation (e.g., decorating your bedside table or composing silly responses to “How are we feeling today?”) to transform passive endurance into active engagement, but always prioritise your recovery and staff guidelines over literal implementation of the wilder ideas.

Toft deserves applause for tackling an underexplored niche with originality and wit. While not every suggestion is actionable, the book’s core achievement is its reimagining of hospitalisation as a space for creativity rather than mere endurance. His willingness to confront darkness with humour, as in his proposed epitaph “Oh no, there’s only fools down here,” is both brave and cathartic. The book may not be a practical manual, but it serves as a vital reminder that patients require more than just medical care; they also need tools to reclaim their humanity. For that alone, 70 Things You Can Do While Being Hospitalized is worth every patient’s time, offering not just laughs but a lifeline to those who need it most.